Recession Woes

I can’t remember the last time I bought clothes for myself or the kids without bee-lining it directly to the sales rack. I can’t even remember the last time I bought something that wasn’t absolutely (or pretty damn close to) necessary. Before we had kids, my husband and I used to enjoy eating out at nicer restaurants on a regular basis. We don’t do that anymore. We use generic brand diapers (or wash our own) and have mostly given up on organic groceries. When Young C asks for a treat while we’re out I usually just tell him that I don’t have enough money for treats today. He seems to get it.

Believe it or not, though, the recession hasn’t been bad to us. (At least not yet. At least not until my mat leave runs out in … gasp … four short months and I find out that there is no paid work for me. At least not as long as my husband can avoid being laid off.) In fact, because we had no savings (in the form of mutual funds or otherwise) we didn’t lose anything. And since we don’t own a home, that didn’t depreciate either! Yay! But we did buy a new car thanks to the 0% interest rates they’re giving out, and we did have another baby which tips the daycare/salary ratio in the direction of my staying home. So even though we are making, right now, as much as we ever have, we are still pretty broke.

I would like to have some more money, of course. A down payment on a house, for example, and education and retirement plans, and a little more wiggle room in the spending budget. But for now, day to day, I know my kids are fine. They don’t mind wearing hand-me-downs and buying generic brand products. They like the park even though it’s free. They love our apartment because it’s home and they get lots of chances to run around in aforementioned parks in the summer and at the Ontario Early Years Centre and the local rec centre in the winter. They have a ton of family that love them and they have shelves of books and a library card, too. They’ve got me everyday engaging them and reading to them and talking to them, so they really don’t need Montessori.

When they ask for extras, I just tell them no. When they get older and ask for ever more extras, I’ll keep telling them no as much as I have to. I explain that some things are too expensive right now. And they get it. Kids get the simple fact of not having enough of something. Sometimes they run out of things, too. They don’t blame us for it. They don’t attach any moral value to money. I remember thinking how nice it would be to be able to afford more when I was a kid. But I knew it wasn’t in the cards and didn’t waste any time dwelling over it. It is easier, in many ways, to just say no, we can’t. Easier than saying no, you’re not allowed. (Which I do, too, don’t get me wrong.)

Still, we have the basics covered. We’ve got rent and groceries and food and clothing every month. We have national health care and good public schools in the area. My husband has dental benefits and a drug plan. We even have cable tv (for now). The recession has been much harder on others. As unemployment rates skyrocket and banks foreclose on homes the number of people, of families, of children living in poverty is rising dramatically. And our social safety nets are overflowing. Last week, Katie Couric talked with a group of mommy bloggers from the Silicon Valley Moms Group about an on-going CBS report called Children of the Resession. She asked them to share their own stories and spread the word and get people talking about the plight of these children, to get people acting on their behalf. The Silicon Valley Moms Blog recounts the interview and provides a complete list of the participating bloggers. They each wrote their own posts inspired by the interview, most notable are Her Bad Mother on her own family’s financial plight, Hope 4 Peyton about needing to re-locate, and Mommy Melee about her home going into foreclosure.

It’s easy to avert our gaze when times are tough. It makes sense that we will concert our energies and focus on getting our own families through this lean spell. But it is now, during a recession, that charity and benevolence are needed more than ever. So thanks for the reminder.