Mom guilt for me usually revolves around two things: diet and TV. I’ve gotten a lot better with the guilt thing as my kids have gotten older and I’ve clocked more years of motherhood. You start to realize that one McDonald’s lunch in front of the TV is pretty small potatoes in the long run. And that there is more to parenting than breastfeeding, I’m afraid. It’s not that simple.
Still, I’m not immune. Since Colum has started school, lunch has become a rushed and harried experience. We have to be at the school bus stop (a 5 – 10 minute walk with kids) at noon which means we should really be sitting down to eat lunch at 11am. Which means … we should be eating breakfast at what time? Earlier than we do, that’s for sure. I also try to do some work in the mornings while the kids play together (I said “try”), so I’m usually running up to get lunch on around 11 and then we sit down between 11:15 and 11:30 and then my kids proceed to go for the world record for longest time ever to eat a cheese sandwich and some veggie sticks. It’s crazy. Finally we finish eating and it’s off to the bathroom for precautionary pre-school pees. Added bonus: Irene’s toilet training now, so she needs to go, too! Then it’s the mayhem of trying to get two kids suited up for the winter, one of whom is two and therefore throwing a tantrum at the bottom of the stairs because I only let her turn the lights on and off three times. The other is a fairly co-operative four year old, but also the most distractable person on the face of the earth. So I wind up putting his snow suit on for him because we have to go even though he should be doing it himself by now.
This all amounts to an extremely stressful lunch and a mad dash to the school bus peppered with much yelling and tears. I told another mom at the bus stop that’s it’s just so hard to squeeze lunch in that early; how does she do it? Her answer: she doesn’t. “I stopped trying,” she said. Instead, they eat a big breakfast a little later, have a snack before school, and she packs a more substantial school snack. Ah.
There have been days when getting dressed took so long, we did brunch instead of lunch, but I worried it wasn’t enough. They don’t get much time to eat their snack at school and I worried Colum wouldn’t get through much more than the cereal bar or muffin I usually pack him. I worried that I needed to provide a typical meal structure even though it wasn’t working for us. I guilted myself into it.
So as of tomorrow we’re trying something new. It will be fresh fruit first thing in the morning and then a big brunch meal around 10:30. I’ll pack a standard snack and also have something ready to go for after school. That should keep them fed and take the edge off our mid-day rush. (I hope!)
Now I just need to wake up before them to get some work done.
