10. In bed.
Yeah right. They suss me out every morning no matter how hard I pretend to still be asleep.
9. The bathroom.
This is a classic. Bring your phone, a book, a magazine and a selection of forbidden treats. Of course, I never get more than three minutes tops before a toddler is climbing onto my lap and another kid is dragging a collection of scarves in for me to untangle.
8. Their playroom.
Best place in the house to read in peace, hands down. They will have dragged half their crap upstairs and set up in whatever room I am most likely to be in. Then I sneak down to the basement and nestle amidst the overturned boxes of Lego and Hot Wheels and play food and immerse myself in a book. I can usually get a couple chapters in before they realize where I am.
7. The car.
“What’s that? Oh yeah, traffic was a nightmare. I totally just pulled in right this minute. I wasn’t surfing Facebook on my phone for 20 minutes in the driveway at all. That would be wrong.”
6. Their bedrooms.
Walk up the stairs with a basket full of clean clothes and call out, “Hey guys! Who’s going to help me fold and put away your clothes?” Come to think of it, I really shouldn’t waste all that alone time tidying up their rooms.
5. The office.
One of the downsides of working out of a home office is that the office never closes. One of the perks of working out of a home office is that the office never closes. Is working really the same as hiding though? Is Pinterest surfing for shoes really working? Who am? Descartes? I don’t know!
4. The front door.
Simply call out, “Come on, guys! It’s time to go!” And then enjoy the sound of crickets while they all scatter to opposite ends of the house. I haven’t actually tried this one yet, but c’mon, how genius is it?!
3. Book club.
I really hate to spend an evening away from my family once a month, but literature is important.
2. The doctor’s.
What do you know? Time for another pap smear already!
1. The kitchen.
When we first got the hood installed over our stove I was annoyed at how loud it is. I was so naive. Now I park them all in front of the TV in the living room, crank some music in the dining room, turn on the hood and it’s like they’re not even home.
Where else can I hide from my children?
2 replies on “Top 10 Places I Hide From My Children”
If you want the bathroom thing to work you just have to tell them you’re running them a bath and ‘poof’ they’re gone. No? Is that only my daughter then?
Brilliant! Would work for 2/3 kids for me. Sadly, the toddler always wants a bath.